Why you should write a failure resume

How ironic is it that we are all the outcome of our challenges, difficult experiences and hardships, yet what we show the outside world is that we are perfect beings with perfect lives. Look at anyone's LinkedIn or Instagram or any other social profile and all you see is how awesome everyone and their life is. My worry isn't really the social profiles, because they hardly matter. My worry is whether we acknowledge, even to ourselves, that we are the sum total of all the goods and the bads.

First, everyone writes on LinkedIn that they're a good project manager or a good people manager. Let me tell you, both are acquired skills. Nobody is born with them. You experiment, you fail and you learn, and that happened with me too. Before becoming a people manager, I always thought I was a people's person and it would be a cakewalk. I was absolutely wrong. I failed miserably for a couple of years, and I only started picking up momentum as a manager when I realised one template doesn't fit all. Most importantly, I understood that what is a priority for me might not be a priority for someone else. Everyone you deal with is a unique person.

Second, for those who don't know, I'm a published author. My book, Blue Crayons: tales from life and beyond, came out four years ago, and I have honestly struggled to sell it. To be absolutely open, I haven't even recovered half the cost of co-publishing it. I felt good about my stories, and I assumed everyone else would like them too and the book would sell like hotcakes. I was just very delusional. I failed because I made minimal effort to promote or sell the book. I learnt the hard way that if you're confident in your product, you have to sell it without shame. And don't wait for the outside world's validation and support before making your own game plan. Everyone out there has their own insecurities and their guard up, so if you're banking on others to sell on your behalf, you're set up for failure. Own your art, your product and your plan.

Third, for the longest time I saw things and people through the lens of my belief system, and accepted or rejected them on that yardstick alone. To top it up, I fooled myself by calling this belief system my sixth sense or intuition. What was really happening was that I could only see and acknowledge a little, because I kept demonising the traits and instincts that fell outside my beliefs. A belief system is essential in the early years, while we're learning and experiencing new things, because it gives structure to our thoughts and keeps us on track. But with time we need to outlearn everything and everyone, otherwise the limited information we have becomes a virtual boundary and builds walls of ego that stop us from seeking the truth. I'm not saying discredit everything or be rude. I'm saying keep a knack for learning more, question old patterns, and surrender to the abundance of possibilities. Allow the light to reach you.

I always say that unless we acknowledge a problem, there's no way to correct it. We are always the first to demonise others and the first to give ourselves the benefit of the doubt. Be proud of your failures and make it normal to accept them, because we learn the most when we are down. When we're going up, we're just busy celebrating.

Rahul Rawal is the founder of Thrive & Include. This post first appeared on the old Thrive & Include website in February 2025.

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